I gave a talk last week to a group of amazing, smart and evolved women. They listened intently to my take on establishing a healthy relationship with food and they all nodded in agreement as I talked about the need to let go of all the negativity associated with restrictive dieting. But, in the end, all they wanted to know was “What should we eat?”

Trust your hunger

My message of tuning in to the wisdom of our bodies, including them in the conversation, was lost on these women who, like so many, are suffering from a “high fact” diet. You don’t have to look too far to notice the huge amount of diet books, nutritional systems, celebrity doctors promoting products promising miracle fat loss, and eating experts telling us what to do – and what they are saying is dramatically different from one another.  What is even more fascinating is that each of these experts is offering scientific proof that their theory is best. How do we make sense of this? There is so much information out there regarding nutrition but so very little wisdom in what truly nourishes us. The field of nutrition piles on us the “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” of how we can get healthy, skinny, sexy, and happy. With all these rules, how can we ever learn to trust our hunger, our appetite and body’s wisdom? What so few of these diets and experts address is the most important ingredient – YOU.

How do you eat?

Do you eat fast or take your time, eating mindfully, with pleasure? People who eat at a fast pace are in a physiological state of stress when they eat. This will have a negative effect on digestion, assimilation of nutrients, metabolism, and ultimately, weight. We need to be slow and relaxed eaters. Too many people are in a battle with food, viewing hunger, calories and healthy fats as the enemy. These toxic nutritional beliefs need to be addressed in order to have a healthy relationship with food and find a healthy way to eat in order to reach our natural weight.

Why do you eat?

We are supposed to eat when we are hungry, stop when we have had enough.  This is difficult for many of us. Food is a source of pleasure. As newborns the first experience of love and nurturing occurs as we are fed. Later on, we develop wonderful associations with food and a beloved grandmother, or a holiday tradition. These associations can easily translate to unhealthy habits in the way we relate to stress and this association with pleasure is distorted. At some time we may have come home from a bad day and eaten a bunch of chips and feel better almost immediately. The mind records, feel bad, eat chips, feel better. The next time you have a bad day, the mind will automatically repeat this useful behavior – we have learned to seek temporary pleasure in order to avoid immediate pain.

You can make the positive changes to how you eat and what you eat so you can understand why your past dieting efforts have failed….it’s not about willpower, it’s about choice. Next time you feel yourself eating in response to a bad day, a painful conversation, or boredom, ask yourself if this is what you really choose to do. Even if you choose to continue to overeat, you are developing your “choosing muscles” and making them stronger. Taking time to question, get curious, puts space between you and the beliefs that may be keeping you stuck in old behaviors. It is in that space we can grow.

So, to answer the question, “What should I eat?” – my response is as follows. Eat what makes you feel good, body, mind and spirit. Instead of thinking comfort food, think peaceful food. Comfort food doesn’t really comfort, after the initial feelings of guilt set in. What foods make you feel most nourished, nurtured and give you energy? What foods can you choose to insure you are taking care of yourself in a loving way, rather than in a self-indulgent way. Instead of following the latest diet rage that has been sold to you by an industry that sets you up for failure, include your body in the conversation. When the HOW and WHY are addressed, the WHAT is easily answered. Trust your body, connect to it.

I would love the opportunity to continue the conversation with you. Interested in private coaching? Call or email and I will be in touch to set up your Breakthrough Discovery Session.

Warmest regards,

Mindy